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Testimonials


"I am in a relationship with a borderline. I was at my wits end and in so much pain. I was so confused. Then I purchased and read A.J. Mahari's 3 Ebooks for Non Borderlines and I found her amazing first-hand knowledge and insight life-changing and so emotionally freeing. I feel like I owe my emotional peace and freedom to you A.J., thanks so much for all you do and all you share to help others."

-- Mike Miller, Chicago, U.S.A.

"A.J., your ebook about Verbal Abuse helped me to realize so much. I needed to know that I was placing myself in danger and that verbal abuse is not something to minimize. I also needed to know that toxic relating isn't love. Thanks so much for writing and making that ebook available."

-- Duke P., Ireland

"I would highly recommend A.J. Mahari as life coach especially for those who are non borderline. I worked with A.J. over the course of 6 months as I struggled to end my relationship with my BPD girl friend. A.J. was compassionate, supportive, and so patient with me. I don't think I'd be where I am today without A.J.'s support."

-- Marty Green, Ontario, Canada

Splitting in Borderline Personality - Loved Ones

Splitting in Borderline Personality -  Loved Ones

Price: $15.99

Splitting in Borderline Personality Disorder
- An Understanding for Loved Ones


Loved ones of those with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) often grapple to understand this central manifestation of BPD.

In the face of the reality of the splitting that is a hallmark of BPD, loved ones will benefit from coming to realize what the cycles of idealization and devalution that are the result of the cognitively distorted black-and-white all-or-nothing polarized thinking of those with Borderline Personality Disorder.

It is not possible to rescue someone with BPD from BPD or from the defense mechanism of splitting that is central to BPD. It is important to learn how to cope with the inconsistent reality of the emotional roller coaster of being split by someone with BPD into either and all-good idealized category or an all-bad devalued category.

In this audio program, A.J. Mahari, offers loved ones of those with Borderline Personality Disorder insight and understanding about the central defense mechanism of splitting in BPD and what that means for relationships. Mahari also talks about the importance of loved ones learning to radically accept what borderline splitting really is and means in terms of who the person with BPD in your life really is and/or isn't.

Coming to terms with this understanding and insight will make it clear to you how and why you cannot rescue someone with BPD and what that really means for you and what it means for relationships.

Loved ones of those with BPD need to radically accept and surrender to the reality that they are powerless to effect much desired change and/or healing in their borderline loved ones.

Tracks in This Audio Program include:

Track 1:  The Roots and Anatomy of Borderline Splitting
Track 2:  The Powerlessness of Loved Ones to Rescue a person with BPD
Track 3:  Whose problem is it really? Why does it feel like your fault?
 Track 4: Radical Acceptance of the Powerlessness to Change or Control Borderline Splitting
 Track 5: Splitting and the Non Borderline's Experience of BPD - What About You?

All Audio Programs are in mp3 format. All Ebooks are in PDF format. Audio Programs and Ebooks are available for electronic download only upon purchase.

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Quotes From A.J. Mahari


"The inner child in those with BPD, due to the pain that borderlines have abandoned, may well feel overly controlled, abandoned, silenced, and neglected. The borderline's inner child is in tremendous pain and it is also the gateway to the lost self of the borderline."

-- A.J. Mahari in her Audio Program, "From False Self To Authentic Self In BPD - Getting in Touch With the Inner Child"

"The central source of negativity in BPD is what I call the core wound of abandonment. It is the abandonment wound that is the foundation of the black-and-white all-or-nothing thinking that perpetuates the borderline one-sided and pervasive negative experience in life. This negativity in those with BPD blocks them from the experience of hope. Hope is a central ingredient necessary for getting on the road to recovery."

-- A.J. Mahari in her Audio Program, "Finding Hope From The Polarized Negativity of BPD"

"Why is it that we allow so much pain and chaos to be a part of how we define love? What is it that we still need to learn so that we can free ourselves from the burden and the pain of investing in rescuing a borderline? What is it that you still need more awareness about? What are the lessons?"

-- A.J. Mahari in her Ebook, "Full Circle - Lessons For Non Borderlines"